Friday, August 26, 2005
I was happy... really happy... after a cry from yesterday...alone...After a slept... I was really feeling so much better... I told myself... It is the start of the day... Really... Start of a brand new day... a Happy one...I was so happy...Went to school.. studying for SS n Chem Test.. I told myself... to look at the bright side of life... Having Chem test today.. was a good one... at least I can be more relaxed during the weekend...So I wasn't unhappy or stressed at that point.. not at all.. I was still the mad and happy MAD... Happy studying...observing one another emotions at the start of a brand new day... Then...in the afternoon.. very tired... run here and there... helped mdm goh... Then... celebrate her burfdae... I was super happy at that time... It was my first time celebrating burfdae for her... I had always treated her as my another grandmother... However, I am able to see her more than my real grandmother...She is really nice... Very nice to talk to her... everytime helped us... she is the one.. always clearing up council room for us... Although she don't recieve extra pay... But she don't mind... She is jus so nice... I am so glad to know her... glad that someone told us her burfdae... glad that we can finally repay her for all that she had done for us... Mdm Goh... we love u... Thanks for all the things u had did... Wishing u an early burfdae... It was really great to see her smile... to feel the happiness and how touched she was... Thanks to Kenny, Andy, Audrey,Shermaine and Michelle... for making such a good n happy celebration for her... I am sure that she really enjoyed it alot....Then went for meeting and for choir...Darius came back...everything seems different...Everything was fine at that point of time... Everything was good.. even when I go home...Recieved a gift from my brother... one of my wishlist gift...I was super excited...Only until I came online... Read some people blogs... feel so sorry and sad suddenly...The glass bottles in my hearts... after cracking yesterday... not yet recovered, had once cracked again today... Every memory jus keep flowing out... Every unhappiness jus flow out... Suddenly... I love darkness...I want to hide myself in a pitch black place... Where no one can see my face... Then I can sit by the corner... think about all the things that had once happened.... cried all i want...I simply jus can't share with anyone how I feel.. Why am I depressed for the 2 days... I wanted to tell.. I wanted to share... But it seems that everything jus get stuck at my throat... It seems as if I am dumb... I jus can't say out... In the end... everything is once again... push back into the healed bottles.... Maybe that jus me...I really dun noe wad to say.... Jus wish.. after a cry... after a slept... everything is a new beginning again... I believed... after the slept... I can forget about every unhappy things and look ahead... Thats the only way ba....='( What exactly is wrong??
mad was here with broken pieces of glass....='(
thats what friends are for;
8:43 PM
